


Leave Me Alone

by chihirosimp



Category: Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Major Character Injury, Major Character(s), Multi, Not Beta Read, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, also pls be nice i'm tired, idk how to tag pls help lmao, yes this is a vent fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 07:08:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28952451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chihirosimp/pseuds/chihirosimp
Summary: Nagito is alone...isn't he always? Maybe he can finally rest, he's heard it's peaceful, but turns out it isn't as calming as people describe. He decides to make a phone call. He's not sure if that's a good or bad idea. Let's see.
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito/Nanami Chiaki, Hinata Hajime/Nanami Chiaki, Komaeda Nagito/Nanami Chiaki
Comments: 7
Kudos: 52





	1. Change

**Author's Note:**

> TWS : su//cide attempt, raz0r bl4des, s//h ( i don't graphically describe it but at one part especially it is HEAVILY implied )  
> -  
> PLSSSSS I SWEAR THIS ENDS HAPPY im gonna write another chapter as long as people seem to like this also this is my second ever fic,, first one i'm postin- so pls be nice cause i really wanted to post this and didn't get to ask someone to beta read it cause i wanted to post it rn lmao anyways i hope ya like it :D

Heavy breathing.

It echoed throughout the room of the dorm as Nagito swayed on his feet, likely from dizziness due to low oxygen. He seemed to be staring into the abyss, physical body all too here but consciousness thousands of kilometres away - on another plane of existence if you will. From an outside perspective it might have seemed like he was simply zoned out, but that couldn't be farther from the truth.

A closer look into the room and you would immediately be able to tell something is off without even having to know anything about him or who he was. The energy itself was enough to make even the calmest people feel unsettled, uncomfortable, worried, and powerless to intervene or stop the situation that was in the midst of playing out. The room felt as if it could crumble any second however, Nagito gave off no energy at all in comparison. It was almost as if there was simply a black hole in the space where he was standing.

His mind swirled with thoughts of all sorts. It made him so angry. Nagito fell to his knees and started to silently sob against his will. He didn't understand why he was crying if he was angry, _weren't people only supposed to do that if they're sad?_ Either way here he was, on the floor breaking down sobbing. It was just- so... loud, but he couldn't stop it. Trust him, he tried, god did he try. No matter how hard Nagito tried though, it would all be in vain. He couldn't control it and would be forever powerless to stop it. 

Thoughts.

These thoughts... they would just come, but they wouldn't go. Once these thoughts came, he would be forced to watch as his mind latches onto them and sucks all the life out of them, using them to their full potential and then twisting them to use them even more. Even when it should be done, it refused to run out of fuel. It would even take things from the past and scipher off those to add to its current supply before going after those themself as well, fangs bared. It wouldn't stop. It followed him since the day he was born and will stay with him until the day he dies, tearing him apart from the inside and forcing him to cause damage to the out.

The only way he could defy it, get rid of it and, in turn, himself.

He finally looked up from the floor with watery eyes and blurry vision, and looked towards the bathroom door. He could finally be free. Happy and unburdened with repercussions to those around him, whom he loved and cherished. There was not a sliver of doubt in his mind. Maybe someone would be sad, but they'd get over it. For them, those emotions and thoughts are temporary, they are able to distract themselves. He envied that. He would do anything for that. He **wanted** it. That being said, Nagito is not stupid. He knew he could never have that no matter how much he wanted or fought tooth and nail for it. He couldn't change it and that just went to show how expendable and powerless he was with the fate of others, and especially himself.

Nagito stood himself up slowly on shaking legs and achy, grinding joints, protesting at the thought of simply existing. He turned towards the bathroom and, once again, got terribly dizzy as he started trudging his way over to the door with many thoughts going through his mind, but only one of his own. A plan. Normally he might be surprised he finally decided he would go through with it after so long of being fearful but, he was angry and was actually able to decide something for himself and control a thought. Besides, he had heard death was peaceful, like you were letting go of something you had been clutching onto so hard your fingers hurt and knuckles turned white.

Turning the knob of the bathroom door, he stepped in the room, left foot first. He turned around upon entering the room and grabbed the doorknob with the opposite hand this time and shut it twice. Upon entering the room, Nagito pressed his back against the door and slid down as his knees gave out. It felt like his heart was too big and heavy for his chest. His feelings were strangling him with bare hands attempting to keep a single word from leaving his mouth ever again. He was so full of excess energy, his thoughts racing; they were going a million kilometres a minute making him feel a rush of negative energy powering him to do the only thing he knew how to make things better.

Even if it wouldn't make things better for him, it would make things better for others. If he doesn't... bad things will happen, the same way bad things will happen if he were to ever open his window or not turn on the sink right. _Why am I thinking about this so much? Just shut up, you know what to do._ He tried to choke down his sobs enough to see the room around him as he started crawling over to the sink grasping to one thought while the rest of his mind formed into some kind of undecipherable monster, just like him. _Ah yes, that's right._ He thought before being consumed whole. _I really am just a monster, aren't I?_

Nagito pulled himself up heavily once he reached the sink, shaking like a leaf in the wind. The drawer of the attached cabinet opened with little resistance further proving to him that he should do this. He fumbled around with his trembling hands to obtain the razor blades he bought and kept in this drawer. Nobody ever comes over so he never bothers to hide them because who would want to visit someone as pathetic as him anyway? Hesitantly, he looks up at the mirror. He sees a young child in a hospital gown, alone, with nothing but a blank stare decorating his face. _Pathetic._

There were so many things he wished he could tell that little boy in the mirror. Conflicting, comforting and destructive, encouraging and realistic, hopeful and... _anyway._ The child who always wanted to be special to someone, even if that someone is only one person, it was disgusting to look at. He sneered at him before turning away from the mirror and sitting facing the door, back to the wall. He looked down to his hand containing the razor blade. It was bleeding. He must have been holding onto it too hard. _Oh well._ Nagito felt his phone vibrate a single time in his pocket before becoming still again.

Was he curious? Of course, any person would be, sane or not. He wouldn't need to answer it though, considering that it was his phone, it wasn't important.He grabbed the razor blade properly and looked at it for a moment. He was sure he should do this but a very small voice in the back of his mind was pleading him not to and he wanted to listen to it so badly, but it was wrong. He was conflicted, but he shouldn't be. He stared at it one more time, tears making it hard to see clearly and the shaking of his thin body making it even more distorted.

He blinked.

Next thing he knew it felt as if his skin was on fire. He was dizzy. He was tired. Everything was decorated in a singular colour. 

His phone vibrated again.

Suddenly, regret washed over him. He wasn't sure whether it felt gentle or suffocating, but it didn't matter which because either way, they both had the same result. Nagito dropped the blade on the tile floor with a very soft clink, that fell upon deaf ears, as he started to grab his phone and unlock it with trembling, ice cold fingers. With every breath he felt more and more tired but he didn't want to sleep. He clawed at his throat attempting to get it to open up so he could get his words out. He had a lot of recent text notifications but he ignored them in favour of opening his contacts. He didn't have many so it was easy to find the one he was looking for before he abruptly stopped.

_Should I- Should I do_ this? He drew in a shallow, wet breath before pushing that thought aside. He wanted to hear them whether this be the last time or not. _But what if they get worried?_ He might not even have to worry about that so with that question answered and his brain seemingly out of fuel he finally clicked the contact and with a static and numb feeling of worry going through his legs and stomach, he steadied his tremors enough to click call.

The phone was ringing. 

It only rang once before he heard a click and a voice he loved too much ring out on the other side of the call.

"Nagito?" it said full of concern as the jingling of keys could be heard in the background.


	2. Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ringing, ringing, ringing. A certain duo of ours get a call from their lover that sends sparks up their spines. How will this unfold? At the end of the day all they can do is hope that things will be okay...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWS : su//cide attempt, s//h, hospitals (mentioned)  
> -  
> i'm sorry it took me so long to upload this chapter thats my bad yall 😰😰 pls read the notes at the end tho cause they're very important ( if you are okay reading something like what in it pls don't read em if you don't think you can handle it or if it makes you uncomfy )

This was bad.

This was very, **very** bad.

Nagito wouldn't answer the phone. He wouldn't answer either of them. He sucked in a tense and worried breath as he tried to calm his nerves. Chiaki beside him seemed to be just as much, if not more worried, to the point where she was almost physically shaking. The only thing keeping the two of them even somewhat calm right now was each other, and even then they both were panicking and knew the other was as well. Chiaki stopped trembling in order to focus enough on her words to get them to come out.

"Maybe he's just doing something and forgot to take his phone with him," she suggested, but they both knew damn well that wasn't true. Nagito never left or forgot his phone **anywhere**. As both lucky and unlucky as the guy was, you'd think he would, but he did not. He never did. On top of that, he always read their messages immediately, even if he was busy. It took him a couple of minutes to respond occasionally, but it's been much more than a couple minutes and he's yet to even look at all their messages and missed calls. That's how they both got to where they are, sitting on the couch of Hajime's apartment, staring intensely at his phone with their group chat open. Then all of a sudden...

**...the phone rang.**

Both of them jumped up off the couch and headed towards the front door with haste. Hajime answered the phone as quickly as he could, putting it on speaker, and grabbed his keys. Chiaki waited by the open door and let out a quiet, terrified yet slightly relieved gasp as he attempted to steady his voice so as to not startle Nagito.

"Nagito?" he said with an upward inflection in his tone. They had both stopped dead in their tracks as they heard air noisily getting pulled into his wet, ravaged lungs. It felt as if time had stopped and years were seeming to pass as they heard their boyfriend trying to breathe on the other end of the line. Finally, they heard a raspy voice ring out quiet and broken from the phone.

"I messed up...help." And with that, the world seemed to crash around the two of them. The two's shoulders raised and tensed up as their lover confirmed what they had been thinking all along. They raced out the door, barely even bothering to close it as the pair quickly descended the floors of the building and headed into Hajime's car.

"Nagito," Hajime said in a soft, loving voice. "I understand, but would you mind answering a couple questions for me?"He looked over to Chiaki, eyes full of concern, to which she nodded and continued. "You don't have to if you don't want to," she stated. "Either way, we love you so much and that will never change. Please hang in there...okay?"

A hum of response echoed out the phone before he properly responded. "I- I'll an...swer." It came out broken and crackling from both his voice and typical static possessed by some mobile phones. Hajime put his keys into the slot in the car and turned it. The car started up with ease as he handed the phone to her to hold while he drove. He turned in his seat. looking behind him, and started backing out as quickly yet carefully as possible; now was not the time to get too reckless. Being reckless would only worry both of them more and slow their efforts to physically reach their boyfriend.

Upon backing out, Hajime let out a small sigh and turned out the lot to head towards Nagito's apartment; the three of them did each have different places of residence , Hajime and Nagito having their own apartments and Chiaki living with her father, however they more often than not all stayed over at one of theirs. Hajime spoke up to break the overbearing silence, minus Nagito's wheezy gasps.

"Okay first question, Nagito." He could be heard feebly attempting to steady his breaths to prepare for Hajime's question on the other end. "Are you at your apartment?" Obviously he knew the answer was yes but it would still help to get a solid confirmation over an accurate assumption. Nagito nodded before replying with a brief verbal confirmation seeing as they could only hear him. He was starting to get really dizzy, it was getting hard to hear. Chiaki asked if the boy was still there, concern flooding into her voice and the only response given to the two was a hushed whisper.

"Nagito," Hajime started, voice raised a slight bit due to the stress of the situation. "Please stay with us. I have one more question and you don't have to answer if you don't wish to but please let us know if you heard it." There was a slight pause before a weak noise could be heard from Nagito's line. "How bad is it?" There was a pause. It felt as if it lasted hours even though it was maybe 8 seconds at most. Hajime was trying his best to stay focused on the road but god was it hard in situations like this.

"It's everywhere. W-Why's... so much? I'm tired but... don't wanna sl-sleep." Nagito felt the tears he'd been trying desperately trying to hold back so he could talk prick at the corner of his eyes. And with that, he finally started to break down, choked sobs wracked his fragile body. _He didn't want to die._ "I m-miss both... you- I- wanna see... please." The two tried not to choke up as their hearts dropped to their stomach and worry seemed to clog their throats. Chiaki attempted to soothe the other boy through the phone with a series of hushed whispers, that she prayed he could hear, and reassurances that they'd be there in a couple minutes.

Hajime turned into the lot of Nagito's apartment complex and parked in the closest spot possible, not caring how bad of a job it may have been. He pulled the keys out of the car, probably more aggressive than necessary, and hopped out of the car with Chiaki, slamming the door and locking it as quickly as possible. Nothing was on the duo's mind but their other partner as they swiftly made their way up to his apartment. The whole way up Chiaki attempted to comfort Nagito and Hajime chimed in helping the other boy stay awake as well.

Upon reaching the door to the residence of their boyfriend, Chiaki handed the phone back to Hajime and fished the key to the door out of her pocket as quickly as she could. With hands wracked with tremors, she put the key into the lock and turned it before hearing the familiar click of the unlocking door. Wasting no time, the two made their way into the apartment, closing the door forcefully and making their way to the bathroom where they heard feeble whimpers of distress ring from. Chiaki grabbed the handle of the door and pushed down, opening it gently so as not to scare Nagito.

The sickly looking boy was slumped against the far wall, his knuckles red as he was losing the strength he had earlier that had him gripping onto the cellphone so hard his knuckles turned white. His hazy and distant eyes seemed to focus in slightly and connect more to reality once he saw the pair enter the room. His tense shoulders slumped and the phone slipped from his hand, clacking onto the cold tile flooring. His whole body seemed to release a sigh as almost joyful tears pricked the corners of his eyes and the faintest trace of a smile crossed his features.

Chiaki and Hajime approached him quickly and as calmly as they could. The boy was already panicking and they didn't want to accidentally contribute to it. Chiaki softly pressed her hands on Nagito's cheeks, holding his face in her hands. She rubbed her thumbs by his eyelids attempting to help brush away some stray tears. Hajime hung up the phone and started to dial the hospital, setting it to speaker, before sitting next to their boyfriend and whispering sweet nothings into his ear. They listened as the ringing echoed not even a full time before someone picked up the line.

Chiaki explained the situation part way before Hajime explained the rest that way they could take turns reassuring their lover as much as possible that he would be alright. _He_ **_would_ ** _be alright. The two vowed to never let anything happen to him that would end with them alone and him 6 feet under. Not after everything they were lucky enough to be trusted to know about him._ The worker told them how an ambulance was already on the way and would help them. They were asked to stay on the line, so they did.

Nagito started to nod off; he was very tired, however the two caught this and kept trying to keep him awake in fear if he fell asleep he might never wake up. He seemed a bit dazed trying to stay awake but just as quickly as he wanted to try and fall asleep again, strangers appeared. It was the ambulance and people with it. Hajime and Chiaki tooks turns re-explaining the situation as quickly as possible to the people. Next thing Nagito knew, he was being carried. He couldn't really tell by who or how but it was warm so he assumed it was Hajime especially since he saw the dull pink of his girlfriend Chiaki's hair next to him. After that the last thing he remembers is everything getting incredibly blurry, more so than before, and he felt very tired.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW : p3d0philia  
> -  
> so i really struggled writing the last few paragraphs of this because recently someone who i trusted turned out to be a p3dophile and groomed me and so i don't think i can update this fic soon because i heavily relate them to hajime and so just thinkin about hajime and sometimes nagito or chiaki reminds me of him and it makes me so angry and nauseous so i'm sorry bout that so i'm gonna be writing mostly drv3 or drthh fics and kinda avoiding sdr2 for now to try and heal

**Author's Note:**

> i hope yall liked it !! if you want i can write a chapter 2 ( i'm plannin to anyway but i want to make sure people want it before i start writin it ) relationships aren't really mentioned in this chapter cause this started as a vent i wrote during a meltdown but in the next chapter(s) if i write em komahinanami will be mentioned tho this isn't a ship revolved fic so keep that in mind if it's not talked about too much 🏄


End file.
